pretty picture

Two jobs on the agenda again today.

I don't want to go!

There was a catchy little jingle on TV when I was a kid ... a song in a Toys R Us commercial ... I don't want to grow up, I'm a Toys R Us kid, there're a million toys at Toys R Us that I can play with ... I catch myself singing that song whenever I feel lazy and whiny ... except, today, instead of singing "I don't want to grow up," I just don't want to get up. I don't want to get up. I don't want to leave my room. I'm tired and lazy and I really, really wish I could find a magical money bag. My bed is so nice. My computer is so handy. My garden's just outside.

Ugh! Grr. Blah!

Whateva.

Right? I don't know. I guess I'd better go.

Talk to you later peeps.

disappointment

I stopped at the grocery store today. It was almost lunchtime and I could smell the fried chicken cooking in the deli. I was hungry and it smelled delicious, but I didn't want to go to work with greasy fingers. Six hours later, on my way home from work, I drove past KFC. The smell of fried chicken filled the street and made my mouth water ... but I was in the right lane and KFC was on the left and I couldn't get over ... so I just kept driving.

But it was too late.

By the time I hit the freeway, I had fried chicken on the brain. I couldn't think of anything else ... fried chicken, fried chicken, fried chicken ... I was hungry! At the end of my thirty-minute commute, when I pulled into Munds Park, I stopped at the restaurant and ordered some carry-out. I got the fried chicken dinner ... I paid $12 for three (or was it four?) greasy pieces of chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans, and a salad ... and it was gross.

G-R-O-S-S

How do you like that?

I spent the day dreaming of chicken and I couldn't even finish it.

Dagnabbit.

Now my stomach hurts and I'm dreaming of dessert.

Ugh.

i've got feet down below my knees

My room is a mess, my garden is growing, I'm working two jobs, and school starts in a month.

I'm tired and hungry and my feet hurt sometimes.

Super-exciting, huh?

I'll try to write something real tonight ... after I finish my homework and before I clean my room ... I've been working on Mars instead of the moon all week. I don't know how long it will last (my project leader is stuck--he can't decide what to do next--so I'm on loan to a Mars project for a few days), but it's nice to take a break from the grainy lunar orbiter pictures.

comforting thoughts?

Imagine me, last night, fumbling around a bar parking lot at 11:30, breaking into my own car (not difficult when it doesn't lock), crawling over seats, and digging through piles of shoes and empty Diet Coke cans while the alarm blared. I was just one more loon outside the Lone Pine ... just off the freeway ... in the middle of the forest ... in the middle of the night. No one even stepped outside to check on the commotion.

Pretty picture, huh?

Despite the location, I wasn't drunk. I just couldn't find my keys after a long day at work. When did that become my life? When did all the bar regulars learn my name? Yes, I work there, but it's still kind of weird. When did gray-haired old men and yellow-skinned bums decide it was okay to hit on me? And how much longer am I going to stay at this place?

if i had a picture of the sun breaking through the clouds

I'm alive! I'm alive! I'm alive!

...and I can actually move and speak and eat again.

My mom called last night. She said she'd just listened to her voice mail from the previous day and I'd left a really sad and pitiful message that actually ended with the words, "I'm dying." Apparently I was calling to say good-bye. It seems funny now, but I absolutely believed it on Wednesday.

Food poisoning (that's what I think it was) sucks!

And, you know, my roommate told me I'd lost weight ... but I tried on my skinniest skinny jeans today (Chip & Pepper, by the way) and they're still a little too tight. I'm wearing them anyway of course. It's the painted-on look or nothing I guess.

it hurts to yawn

I feel like someone stomped all over me. I haven't barfed today ... other than spitting out a little bile every now and then ... but, while not barfing is a good thing, I still feel so weak. Seriously, peeps, it's ridiculous. I can barely stand up straight. I feel like an old woman.

I can't do anything but whine.

I'm sorry peeps.

I am getting better ... and Terri said it looks like I've lost weight.

Maybe, tomorrow, I'll even be able to go to work.

sickfest

My bedroom smells bad. My bathroom smells bad.

I imagine I probably smell bad too.

I've been throwing up, crying, and crawling between bedroom and bathroom for most of the day. I've slept on the cool-cool bathroom floor, on my laundry-covered bedroom floor, and I've even slept on my bed ... when I could muster enough energy to climb into it. My stomach woke me up early today. It had come to life. It was rumbling and grumbling and hopping around inside me.

I won't share details, but today's been bad.

It's 6 o'clock. I just ate for the first time. Now I'm worriedly watching (listening to?) my stomach. Will the cereal stay down? Or have I just refueled another stretch of misery? Based on the build-up of pain, I'm afraid it might be choice number two ... but maybe I'm just being paranoid. Oh, I hope I'm just being paranoid. I was imagining my death earlier today. I shivered and sweated and cried on the floor and wondered if today would be the end of me. I'm not very strong in the face of pain.

one short day

I saw Wicked in Tempe last night.

I finished working on my garden yesterday morning then I showered, pulled on a cute skirt, packed my bag, and headed south. It was 115 degrees and humid by Phoenix standards yesterday ... and I don't have air conditioning in my car. I think I lost fifteen pounds on the drive down. It was miserable. My car felt like a sauna. Two and a half hours in a sauna. Ugh! I stopped at the halfway mark and bought an icy-cold drink. It didn't last very long.

I was a zombie by the time I reached Charlie's house.

I think I spent less than an hour with Charlie and Leslie. They weren't home when I got there and I left almost as soon as they got back. Virginia came over before 5 o'clock. We took her car because it has air conditioning. Sweet, sweet air conditioning! We had Greek food for dinner and then went to the show. Charlie and Leslie were asleep when I got back to their house. They both had to work this morning and I left early to beat the heat.

I got home in time to shower before work.

Now I'm sprawled across my bed listening to the Wicked soundtrack.

I enjoyed the show, but the trip was way too quick.

green?

My roommate/landlord is fifty years old and she's never had a garden.

...until now, of course.

I've spent the morning outside, digging in the dirt, mixing mulch, sifting rocks out of the fabulous volcanic soil of Coconino county, and transplanting parsley, melons, and squash. My mom has had great luck with her broccoli plants this year. I wanted to try a few myself, but I can't find them anywhere. I'll keep looking. I planted some lettuce seeds and I've got basil and tomato ready for potting--I'm going the upside-down route with the tomatoes again and I'm putting basil on top.

I've always loved gardens.

Almost everyone in my family has a garden of some sort.

Morris sent me a picture of his tomato plant (see above) in Queens today. Mike and Becky are the ones who inspired me to try upside-down tomatoes last year. My brother wrote a lot about Ari's garden in Brooklyn this summer. My mom's garden, of course, is pretty fabulous too.

I'll try to post pictures of my garden tomorrow.

Now, though, I need to get on the road. I've got so much to do today! We've had record temperatures (kind of, anyway ... hottest temperatures of the year so far) in northern AZ and the AC in my car has stopped working again. I'm trying to get everything done before noon.

Wish me luck!

Ciao-ciao.

crap update

I just got the tracking information for my latest purchase from Woot.com.

Delivery is still a week away, but I'm excited. Although it's a full kilogram less than my last Bag of Crap, the package weight is encouraging. You can see the "Shipment Facts" for both the last BoC and this one at the top of this post. It's 6.3 pounds this time around ... which means I'm probably not getting a laptop or a big-screen TV ... but think of all the possibilities.

What do you think I'll get?

Maybe a netbook? A dozen bags of air? A handful of mp3 players? The missing battery for the Kodak camera I got in May? Or possibly the battery for a camera in someone else's BoC?

I can't wait for Friday!!

go outside and play!

I finally started my garden today.

About time, huh?

Yes, yes. I know it's July. I usually plant everything earlier than this, but it's been a weird and crazy (and, yes, kind of busy too) year. Plus, you know, I'm living in someone else's house--so I didn't just want to start planting things all willy-nilly. I had to wait until they were ready to give me some ground ... in other words, I had to wait until Keith finished rebuilding the shed ... and today was that day.

Yippee!

I think I planted watermelon, cantaloupe, and squash.

I can't remember for sure.

But you can see how pretty they are in my pictures:

See?

Isn't that pretty?

Ha ha! I'm just kidding.

That really is one of the plants, but they aren't all dead.

Here are some better pics:

I didn't want to start with seeds because it's already so late in the growing season.

Here's a peek at the last remaining survivor (and I use the word "survivor" fairly loosely here) from my old container garden at the apartment in Flagstaff. It's a bell pepper plant. I couldn't keep it in my bedroom because I have no windows--so I left it in the laundry room where the temperatures regularly dropped below freezing over the winter. Now it's outside. It's mostly dead, but I think it'll come back.

I think I'll put in some peppers, basil, and tomato plants this weekend.

I'll see what I can afford.

I got my Arizona state tax bill in the mail this morning. I didn't have enough money to pay my taxes in April so I sent in the forms without any money. I was pretty pleased with the federal government's response last month. I still had to pay, but it was less than I expected and they waived all penalties. Unfortunately, Arizona wasn't nearly as generous or forgiving! Dagnabbit. Money's going to be tight again for a few days ... which means I won't be able to quit my job at the restaurant just yet (not that I was really planning to--but I can dream, you know).

Oh, well, my sweets!

I'm sitting outside, blogging in the back yard, but I think it's time to go in.

Ciao-ciao for now.

silliness, madness, super-cool me-ness

I'm at the library.

Pathetic person that I am, I stopped and checked Facebook on a library computer so I could harvest the rice I'm growing in Farmville because I was afraid it would wither before I got home tonight. When I logged into Farmville from here, I was horrified (horrified, I tell you!) to see that all my animals had disappeared. I'm hoping it's just a glitch--something related to the computer I'm on ... a crappy operating system, an old version of Flash, or something equally mundane and explainable.

I don't know.

I'm super-cool, okay?

But anyway!

I stayed two nights in Chandler this weekend. Sunday and Monday. Unfortunately, I wasn't planning to stay that long and I didn't packed enough underwear. I didn't realize my error until I got out of the shower on Monday morning ... when I couldn't find any clean underpants and I really, really, REALLY couldn't bring myself to pull on the underwear I'd already worn. It was too early to go to a clothing store, but I didn't have time to do a load of laundry. I ended up wearing my pajama pants (I didn't want to wear jeans with no panties--eew!) to the grocery store, sneaking in and out real quick, and buying a 3-pack of Fruit of the Loom bikini briefs.

So embarrassing!

And the bikini briefs are huge. I actually had to roll down the top ... because, otherwise, my jeans wouldn't cover them and I'm just NOT into the underwear-bunched-up-my-back look.

Whatever, though.

My time is running out and I have to run to work.

Ciao bellos.

it's time to get up, it's time to get up

I'm bored. And hungry.

I'm alone in the dark and messy storage closet I call my bedroom. I should be in Arkansas right now ... that's been the plan all summer ... but instead of traveling cross-country, I drove home and went back to work (both jobs, of course) yesterday. I'm thinking of quitting my job, one of them at least, and relaxing a little before the summer is over, but the money is just so addictive. I love earning tips! It's nice to pay down a few bills. It's nice being able to afford an oil change when I need it ... being able to buy textbooks without any major scrimping and budgeting ... and having a passport again. It's even nice to come home at night with sore legs and arms, to come home feeling like I've actually done some work.

So, umm, yeah.

Maybe I won't quit right away after all.

I ordered new glasses from Costco and a Bag of Crap from woot.com this weekend. Two major purchases. I expect both to arrive in about two weeks (mas o menos). The BOC was pure (cheap) lucky. The new glasses, on the other hand, were almost necessary. I'm getting bubbles and flakes in the coating on my current lenses. I guess that's one more reason to stay at the restaurant a little longer--it's nice to have money for an eye exam and new frames again. The only thing better would be having enough money to actually pay for health insurance.

Yeah. I can dream.

...and, while I'm dreaming, I might as well fantasize that my next Bag of Crap will contain a laptop, a big-screen TV, my very own Wii, a dozen iPods, a twelve-pack of Diet Coke, extra storage space, and a magical weight-loss pill. What do you think? Will I be so lucky?

Oh, well!!

I'm starving. It's time to get up and start my day.

fat and sleepy and fat

I bought a Costco pizza last night. I wanted to share it with Charlie and Leslie, to show them I'm not always a mooching house guest, but I'm afraid I ate almost half of it myself. It had been so long since I'd indulged in the cheesy deliciousness of even a single slice ... and I just kept right on indulging ... and indulging and indulging and indulging.

And, if that wasn't bad enough, I also bought ice cream and cookies.

And it was HOT.

I'm surprised I'm still alive.

---

Speaking of surprises, I won another bag of crap from woot.com today! Watch for updates, okay? I should receive it in a couple more weeks. And remember: the anticipation is half the fun (for me, at least). I'll let you know when it arrives.

strange dreams

Weird dreams last night.

Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green were my classmates at NAU. They sat on opposite sides of the room. I was in the middle. They accused me of sex crimes ... in front of the entire class, of course ... it must have been a sociology class ... and, when I denied it, they showed me "proof" on the Internet. The page they pulled up was blank except for a few lines of text. It listed my name, my birthday, and a few other identifying characteristics and then it said I had molested a 16-year-old boy when I was 19. Next thing I knew (it was a dream, after all), I was caught up in a campaign to clear my name. I interviewed old coworkers (people who, when I'm awake, know nothing about my life) to explain that I couldn't possibly be a sex criminal ... that I hadn't even kissed a boy at 19 ... that the website was wrong.

It didn't help.

The dream ended with me trying to figure out how to get rid of the website.

Then, still fast asleep, I dreamed that I called Skip (because we're meeting for breakfast this morning) and he told me I was too late, he was eating as we spoke and he laughed at me and said "next time" and then I woke up.

My dreams are not usually so linear.

Although I'm not sure if those dreams were very linear either ... just weird ... a lot more vivid and, umm, I don't know how to explain it, just weirder than normal. And Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green? Huh? What's up with that?

drop it like it's hot

I'm in Phoenix.

The heat is ridiculous, but my shoulders are looking pretty tan.

I asked Charlie to agree that my shoulders are tan.

His response? "It's bad lighting in here."

Dagnab-him!

Good or bad lighting, I look pretty fabulous, okay?

I got up early and drove down from Munds Park this morning. Charlie and Leslie were hanging out at the pool (not my thing!) so I met up with VLR instead of coming straight to their place. Virginia helped me choose some new glasses at Costco (time for an upgrade) and then we drove out to east-east-East Mesa to buy a birthday present for her cousin's three-year-old son.

Exciting, huh?

I'm glad to have a day off, but the heat is killing me.

I'm glad the AC in my car is working again because it's too hot for words. Walking across parking lots left me completely drained. No amount of air conditioning could make up for the pain of opening doors and stepping outside. I can't believe I used to live here! I've turned into such a wuss.

I can't sleep! It's 4 o'clock in the morning. I dozed off for a few minutes between 1 and 3, but my room is too warm. It's only 75 degrees in here, but there's absolutely no air movement. I feel like I'm suffocating.

I've been looking at fans for the past week or two. It's time to buy.

spellcheck doesn't recognize "munds"

I'm a little bit country, a little bit rock and roll, and a whole lot of sleepy.

Friday night, baby!

What can I say? I'm home alone. The house is quiet. Munds Park is quiet. I live in a tiny little resort town without a single street light. I used to fantasize about small town living. In high school, I even thought I'd be happy on a farm. Forget that! These days I dream about city life. I want to be within spitting distance of grocery stores and take-out food ... I want free deliveries and fantastic sales and my choice of restaurants ... blah, blah, blah ... in other words, peeps, there is no way I'll ever retire to a place like this. Never, ever, ever!

My life might be mundane, but it will also be comfortable.

My roommates are out of town.

The four-year-old is gone.

I'm watching the dog this weekend ... although I'm also kind of, sort of thinking about sneaking down to Phoenix on Sunday for a day of shopping and heatstroke. What do you think? Will it make my roommates mad if I run away and leave the dog behind? Would it be worse if I took him with me? Maybe I shouldn't go at all.

I'm kind of sleepy.

I have homework due by Monday.

I should probably sleep now, work tomorrow, and stay in Munds Park (to do homework and chores and whatever else all day) on Sunday. I so totally hate being responsible sometimes.

fabric ripping, life changing, falling apart

Dear peeps,

I feel compelled to report that I'm no longer the denizen of righteousness you've all come to love, respect, and fear. There's been a rip in my moral fabric.

Two days ago, in a moment of weakness, I bought a pair of Nike shoes.

My first Nike ever.

I know you're shocked. I'm sorry. I'm shocked too. I mean, what's next? When you see me again will I be wearing blood diamonds and fur, stockpiling guns (sorry Mom and Dad, but you know that's not my thing!), eating steak, buying jeans that weren't made in the USA, and seducing strange men at bars?

A few months ago, Charlie or Leslie, Bobby or Virginia, a salesperson at the Nike store or maybe just a stranger on the street told me that Nike has changed their ways. I don't know if it's true or not. Do you? Can you lead me to a credible source to make me feel better? Or worse? I don't know. Maybe Nike is a great company. Maybe they're not. I just know that, years ago, I vowed never to wear them ... and now I have a super-cute pair of made-in-Thailand shoes laid out next to today's outfit.

I'm so ashamed.

But they are super-cute ... and I got them, brand new, for less than twenty bucks (that's probably a bad sign, isn't it?) ... and they're supposed to work as a pedometer or a GPS or something with my iPod ... if only I knew how to set it up.

Maybe I should send all my tip money to Thailand.

I know Skip could help me.

Right, Skip? You would help me, wouldn't you?

Oh, well!

Enough of this madness.

The throw-up-sick, everything-hurts migraine from a few days ago is gone and my mood has greatly improved. It's a beautiful day outside. There's a four-year-old asleep upstairs (Terri's grandson is visiting), waiting for me to attack him. The air conditioning in my car miraculously started working yesterday. I'm going to have a FULL day off on Sunday. Yippee! And my bag is full of tip money again.

Fabulousity, huh?

Not to mention that I have super-cute pair of new shoes to wear to work.

i'm achy and nauseous. is it the swine flu?

I feel like I've reached a breaking point.

Too much work. Too many expectations. My car is breaking down and so am I. I've been working myself to the point of exhaustion. I'm covered in bruises. I have a few dollars in the bank for the first time in months, but I still don't have health insurance.

My head hurts.

I have homework due tomorrow ... and bills too.

I feel like throwing up.

Maybe it's time to start robbing banks, but ... umm, yeah, I don't think so.

Not yet, anyway.

another whining post

I started a new class, babysat a four-year-old, and put in my time on the moon today.

And today was my day off!

Yes, I'm whining about being busy too much. Yes, my work schedule dominated all of four hours today. It's true that four hours isn't a lot. So what? Four hours is the lightest workday I've had in weeks, but it's still enough to keep me in town ... to keep me from sleeping all day ... to take up my time ... and it's definitely enough to allow me to whine.

Blah, blah, blah. Boo-hoo. Whatever.

I'm still tired.

My car doesn't have AC or heat. It's uncomfortable, but I can live without AC. I don't think I can say the same thing about the heat ... not when the temperatures start dropping again ... so I'll have to take it in soon... and, when I do, I might as well ask the mechanic to tell me why the doors won't lock anymore.

Ugh!

waiting or wading?

I just finished my ninth day straight at the restaurant.

Ugh!

I can't tell you how long it's been since I've had a full day off ... a day with no work ... it's been weeks ... maybe even a month by now. The last time I had two days off? Shoot! Not since early May.

I'm tired y'all.

I just about had a breakdown tonight. There were only two servers on duty. We started at the same time and split our tables evenly, but I outsold my co-worker by at least $500. Why were our sales so different, you ask? Well, you see, my coworker didn't answer the phone. At all. He stood there and let it ring. I watched him when I ran out to my tables. The phone started to ring and he ignored it. It continued to ring, but he still didn't touch it. The phone didn't stop ringing. He walked away. Today was my co-worker's last day. He's leaving for NY tomorrow. It wasn't my last day. I couldn't walk away from the phone. So, instead, I was stuck ... drowning in to-go orders while I waited (or tried to wait, anyway) on the same number of tables that my coworker had.

It finally got to be too much.

I'm not sure, but I think I yelled at my boss. In the middle of the madness, when I was running to the pizza kitchen with another special set of instructions for another to-go order, I saw the owner standing in the bar and I hit my breaking point. I don't know what I said. I might have yelled. I might have threatened to quit. I honestly don't remember. Whatever it was, whatever I said, it lit a fire. My boss actually came out and started helping us juggle orders (I think it may have been a first for her). She also called her husband to come wash dishes and she got her manager to drive in from Flagstaff.

Somehow, with everyone's help, I made it through the worst.

I didn't die.

Yes, folks, it's true: I am still alive.

...and guess who is NOT going to the restaurant tomorrow?

celebrate!

I was in a parade y'all!

Terri woke me up with a text message this morning asking if I wanted to be on the Lone Pine Restaurant's float. I got up, got dressed, and went upstairs to tell her no. Somehow, though, when I saw all the candy and craziness, my "no" turned into a "yes."



...and when I say craziness, I mean absolute madness.




Munds Park is a tiny town ... teeny-tiny ... the closest grocery store is more than twenty miles away ... yet, somehow, we manage to host the largest 4th of July parade in northern Arizona every year. The roads were jammed with golf carts and ATVs covered in streamers, old cars decked out in festive balloons, and trucks full of people wearing red, white, and blue. I think the whole friggin' town was either in the parade or on the sidelines watching it ... and the spectators were dressed up as much as the people they were watching.




Strangers pointed and yelled, "Hey! It's my waitress!"

I pointed and yelled, "Hey! There's a painted dog! It's red and blue!"

There was music and sun and lots of sugar and laughter.

It wasn't easy to take very many pictures when I was riding on the float and throwing candy at to kids, but I think this small sampling gives you the gist of things.




Now I have to shower and start getting ready for work. Tonight, I'm planning to wear a holiday shirt from Target and my favorite People's Liberation jeans--because displaying stars on my butt is so perfectly festive ... don't you think?

I'll have to wait until tomorrow to drive into Flagstaff and cruise Art in the Park.

There's no time left today.

medio de la selva

Yesterday was rough.

I woke up early, threw a load of laundry into the washing machine, and spent the morning studying. Then I took one of my finals, printed out my time-sheet, and drove into Flagstaff to go to work. I ran a few errands on the way, put in my time on the moon, and drove straight back to Munds Park to go to work again. 4th of July madness hit the restaurant in full-force yesterday. Thursdays are usually two-server days. There were three of us on duty last night and it wasn't enough. We were turning people away. We blew the fuses and lost all our lights so many times that we finally had to turn off the air conditioning in order to stay open. It was stifling hot and people just kept coming. We ran out of mashed potatoes, baked potatoes, goulash, ice cream, stroganoff, pizza dough, gravy, Italian dressing, and something else. I can't remember it all anymore. The tips were good ... but how good is good on a night like that? I'm not sure it was worth it. By the time we cheerily waved good-bye to our last customers, I could hardly stand up. Everything hurt and I was slimy with sweat.

Lovely, huh?

...and we still had to clean up!

I got home late, showered, and tried to sleep, but I was too wound up.

Now I have a headache and a long to-do list.

I'm not looking forward to going back to the restaurant tonight.

no time

I have no time.

No time for anything. Barely time to breathe. I ate my lunch at 10:30 last night. Real healthy, I know. At least I had time for breakfast though! I can't wait for this week to end. Everything is piling up. Laundry, life, messes. Ugh!